Claudia Sheinbaum's Standoff with Strikes and Snacks

Well, it’s Monday again, and you know what that means. Another day, another edition of the People’s Morning Conference, that daily spectacle where Claudia Sheinbaum stands in front of the press, pretending to make everything sound all fine and dandy, while, behind the scenes, the wheels are falling off faster than a used car bought at a discount lot in the dodgiest part of town.

Now, if you’re like me, the mere thought of attending anything resembling a "conference" makes your heart sink faster than an over-engineered, eco-friendly car attempting to go uphill. But, for those brave souls still keeping up with the spectacle, this morning had all the drama of a high-octane political soap opera.

Let’s kick things off with the first act of the day—judges, legal battles, and the supposed destruction of democracy. Apparently, some judge has dared to get in the way of Sheinbaum’s grand plans by suspending a judicial reform. A minor detail, perhaps, but one that’s made Sheinbaum’s Monday a little less cheerful.

She stood there, with all the confidence of a Formula 1 driver whose pit crew just realized they were out of tires, announcing that her Legal Counsel would be informing the Federal Judicial Council of this judge’s actions. Now, this isn’t just a casual “naughty judge” slap on the wrist; Sheinbaum has made it clear that this move violated the Amparo Law, which, from what I gather, is meant to protect the very foundation of the country’s judicial system.

But, let’s not get bogged down in the legalese. The point here is that Sheinbaum, ever the pragmatic politician, couldn’t resist adding her own dose of drama to the mix. Not only was she in "contempt" of this judge’s ruling, but she was also accused of something even juicier—political gender violence. Yes, apparently, speaking out against a legal decision is now tantamount to launching a full-scale assault on gender equality. Quite the stretch, even by Mexico City’s standards. But what’s life without a bit of hyperbole?

In the next act, we’re treated to a parallel spectacle—the Federal Judicial Branch, hosting their own version of a morning conference, as if it were a cheeky counterprogramming effort. It’s like watching two rival soap operas airing at the same time. Brilliant. But here’s where things get a bit more serious. The Judicial Branch is going toe-to-toe with Sheinbaum’s Executive, holding their own press briefings about the reform at the exact same time, like a well-timed overtaking move in the final lap of a race. It’s all very dramatic.

Sheinbaum, ever the diplomat, says the judges have every right to host their own morning show. It’s a wonderfully passive-aggressive move, one that would make any reality TV producer proud. But beneath the surface, you can almost feel the tension. After all, the judicial system has thousands of workers on strike, collecting their salaries while 13,000 cases languish in bureaucratic limbo. And Sheinbaum, in the most casual of tones, suggests that it might be a good idea for everyone to look into why these workers are on strike in the first place. Oh yes, very casual indeed.

Then, we move into what I like to call the third act—“Zero Impunity,” the title of Sheinbaum’s latest thriller. In this gripping plotline, we learn about the tragic murder of Marcelo Pérez, and the President’s vow to ensure that this crime doesn’t go unsolved. It’s a classic bit of politicking—stand in front of the cameras, promise justice, and hope that everyone forgets when the inevitable delays come along. Still, in a world where politicians rarely make guarantees, Sheinbaum’s commitment to ‘zero impunity’ is about as reassuring as hearing the words “no problem, mate” from a mechanic who’s just spent ten minutes scratching his head under the hood of your car.

She tells us that the Secretary of the Interior has been in close contact with state and ecclesiastical authorities. Coordination, communication, investigation—tick all the boxes, wave your arms about a bit, and hope it all looks good on the evening news. It’s a classic move from the political playbook, but will it deliver? Only time will tell.

And now, to cap off the day's grand finale, we enter the realm of public health, a topic that feels about as exciting as watching paint dry. But, stick with me here, because this one might actually affect the next generation of petrolheads. Apparently, the sale of ultra-processed foods in Mexican schools will soon be a thing of the past. The education system is rolling out a Healthy Living Strategy, and by March 2025, all the junk that kids shove into their mouths at school will be replaced by something that sounds infinitely less exciting.

Mario Delgado Carrillo, the Secretary of Public Education, was there to remind everyone that Mexican children and youth are suffering from sky-high rates of obesity, largely due to their sugar consumption. Now, I’m not one to argue against a bit of healthy living—after all, even I know that too many biscuits will turn you into a human-shaped lump of dough—but mandatory food guidelines in schools? Well, that’s the sort of thing that would have made my younger self cry into his bag of crisps.

The bottom line here is that this isn’t just about what kids eat; it’s about how much control the government is willing to take over people’s daily lives. It's yet another reminder that the nanny state is alive and well, watching over us with a disapproving scowl, while those of us who like to live a little dangerously are left wondering if there’s any fun left to be had in the world.

So, there you have it—a Monday morning in Mexico City, where politics, the judiciary, and school lunches collide in a heady mix of drama, bureaucracy, and a sprinkling of public outrage. Tune in tomorrow for more of the same, because in Claudia Sheinbaum’s world, the show must go on. And trust me, it’s bound to be just as thrilling as a 12-hour race through the streets of Le Mans—minus the cars, of course.