Tulum's Glittering Beaches and Gritty Underbelly

Tulum, where Mayan ruins rub shoulders with Michelin-starred ceviche, and the sand shimmered with both platinum-certified perfection and, you know, the occasional stray bullet. This week's edition of Tulum tidbits comes with a side of intrigue, a dash of electoral ambition, and just a smidge of, well, let's call it “unrest.”

Beach Bling: Melitón González Pérez, head of Zofemat, is on a mission to make Tulum sparkle like a discarded sequin on a dance floor. Four beaches already flaunt the prestigious Platinum Certification, meaning they're as pristine as a mermaid's tears. But Melitón isn't resting on his sun lounger. He's got his sights set on adding more jewels to Tulum's sandy crown, all while battling the pesky plastic-wielding beach barbarians (seriously, guys, leave the butts for cigars, not the shore).

Mayor Mayhem: Speaking of cigars (metaphorically, Melitón is probably more of a kale smoothie guy), things got dicey for mayoral candidate Jorge Alberto Portilla. His son-in-law, enjoying a casual drive down Route 307, got himself a not-so-casual gunshot wound and a kidnapping attempt near the Bahía Príncipe Hotel. Apparently, this wasn't just a drive-by burrito craving. Portilla blames political rivals for stirring the social media pot, while his son-in-law points the finger at a shadowy figure named Commander “Raci,” who might or might not be part of, you guessed it, a “police mafia.” This election season is hotter than a habanero salsa on a beach day.

Re-Election Roulette: While Portilla dodges bullets and accusations, our current mayor, Diego Castañón Trejo, is playing a different game: electoral hopscotch. He's officially thrown his hat (or rather, his sombrero) into the re-election ring, following all the legal hoops like a well-rehearsed hula hooper. Get ready for another round of campaign promises and beachside billboards – sunscreen won't be the only thing shielding your eyes this summer.

Gunfire Graffiti: And just to remind you that paradise isn't always piña coladas and hammocks, two folks in the Veleta neighborhood got a taste of Tulum's grittier side. Bullets, not beach balls, were flying, leaving a man and a woman with some unwanted souvenirs. Luckily, emergency services arrived faster than a free tequila shot, and both are recovering in the hospital. Let's hope this was just a stray storm cloud in Tulum's usually sunny sky.

So there you have it, a week in Tulum where the only constant is the ever-changing tide. Remember, stay hydrated, dodge the political mudslinging, and maybe leave the bulletproof vests at home (unless you're running for mayor, of course). Until next time, keep it weird, keep it sandy, and keep it Tulum.

P.S. Don't forget to bring your swimsuit, sunscreen, and maybe a bulletproof vest (just in case). You never know what adventure awaits in our little slice of Mayan Riviera.